Monday, December 20, 2010

Driving through the snow covered streets today I saw something that made me smile.
I saw little kids all bundled up, barely able to move their little stubby arms and legs. I watched these little tikes stumble overthemselves, racing to reach the top, only to jump on a sled and go all the way back to where they started.

It made me remeber when I was little and could barely wait for the first snowfall. I would climb into my jumpsuit snowsuit (if thats even the correct name) and wait "patiently" as my dad would tie up my snowboots. I would begin to get all hot and sweaty just sitting there waiting for my dad to give me the "ok". I would play for hours and hours outside never getting tired of climbing the same hill over and over again. My nose would run and I would just wipe it all over my face and all over my little gloves, but I didn't care... I WAS SLEDDING!

Today, I wanted to be out playing with those little tikes. I wanted to keep climbing and never get sick of the same hill. I wanted to be content with the same sled, same speed, same hill.

I think I am going to go sledding real soon.


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Today, I was missing my trampoline. I love the feeling of jumping and having your body forced into the sky. I like to look at my house and think I am springing as high as the the chimney.

Sometimes your legs buckle under the pressure, and it can feel like you will never spring back. But eventually we take little bounces that lead us to greater bounces! Even though we may go down sometimes, those downs just make us spring even higher the next time. The bounces just build on each other to make you eventually skyrocket!!! Sometimes, even someone else is able to shoot you high into the sky.

Lately, I have feelings of frustration, and confusion on where life is taking me. Am I in the right career? Is there more I can do to help out? Am I following my plan or God's?

Just keep jumping. :)


Thursday, October 21, 2010

Sometimes we are sick of our daily routines. All we ask for is a little break. Time to kick back relax, maybe make that recipe that is tempting you, paint that picture in your mind, or just talk with a good friend.

I have been wanting this.

I got my break, but just a bit different then what I was expecting ...I got sick.

I now wish I wasn't sitting here, unable to do much of anything. It can be a bit lonely with everyone still on the move and me sitting, real still trying to heal.

I'm over my break!

Monday, October 4, 2010

First week of school over. I struggled, rushed, organized, studied and attempted to get back in the groove of school.

The weekend came and went... fast. I mean faster then a chetah running across some desert somewhere in the world.

Today I had my first clinical orientation. We were in a nursing home.
Ever since I was little I have always felt uncomfortable and hated to go in any nursing home. I use to panic when the idea of visiting my great grandparents in the nursing home would arise.

What random persons lap was my mom going to put me in? Who is going to try to introduce me to their "children" who are actually baby dolls? Who is going to scoot/ drag their feet to pull themselves in their wheelchair closer to you?

These are the images I have from nursing homes.

Today I was uncomfortable. I felt sad. I couldn't stop thinking about the people I saw and their lives.
Once they were young. Once they hoped for love, then maybe they found love and had a family. They lived full lives.
Some filled with mistakes and accomplishments, lessons learned.

They are just trapped in these bodies that are wrinkly, that nature has gotten a hold of and now are growing old with each day....but some of their minds are still young. They still live, love, and have something to contribute to our society.

I bet there is something I could learn from them.
Im sure life went speeding by just like a chetah.
Some probably wish they had slowed down to enjoy the little things.
To enjoy your friends and family.
Not to stress over the little things that won't even matter in a week.

Take each day as it comes.
Take chances.
Actually LIVE your life.

This is my focus for this week.

Monday, September 13, 2010

Sometimes I feel numb.

Numb to the need here in America.

In India I saw the need, and in some strange weird way I feel like I was forced to ignore it in certain situations.

When you are faced with empty out stretched hands every time you step foot in a town, you become numb.

It felt impossible to give to every hand and yet still have enough to survive.

This past week someone showed me something I hope I never forget...

In San Francisco there is plenty of need. I casually walked past people, avoiding eye contact and avoiding their out stretched hands. I avoided their conversations feeling it was a trap for money.

I nudged Jacob to keep walking, but he stopped,

Every out stretched empty hand was filled with a dollar. Every person looking for someone to listen, was listened to.

It was a harsh yet beautiful realization.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Why is it, that sometimes the best decisions are the hardest to make?..or in my case any decision.

It seems like 21 years of facing decisions every day; I would acquire some skill in making them, even a dime size amount.

I actually don’t think it’s the choice that makes it so hard but the outcome of your choice. Sometimes you just have to forget about the outcomes and do what is best for you at that time. Turning down dental hygiene was not a hard choice. In my mind I knew I didn’t want to pursue that as a career currently in my life. It was just facing me and the people I love with my choice that was hard. Realizing that there is a possibility that I might not get into a program I want, made me grit my teeth. My choice in my mind was easy, it was the outcomes I was afraid of that hindered my decision making.

But man, does it feel good when you face what you are feeling and make a decision not based on outcomes.


Saturday, July 17, 2010

When my mom was little, her family each year would climb a mountain called Abercrombie. It is the tallest mountain in stevens county... Impressive I know thats what your thinking. The tradition has now been passed down, and I have been climbing the mountain since I was little. On my first climb my family put a time capsule at the top of the mountain and filled it with random trinkets and a notebook that we and whoever dares to climb and find the time capsule can write in. We have even received phone calls from stranger ( possibly dangerous people) from the top, because my sister thought it was a good idea to put her number in the book.
Pretty much this mountain holds a special place in my heart.
The climb may be steep, but each step brings you closer to the goal.
The goal being the view at the top and the time capsule.
A couple weeks ago I got to make the trip up the mountain again. The time capsule and view were in the back of my mind the whole time hiking to the top. When I got to the top, the first thing I did was find the time capsule.
I found it... and it was destroyed. Someone had left the lid off and everything had gotten ruined from water. The book with all the entry's from climbers was destroyed. I was sad. Things were missing and things were added.
Luckily, my uncle had brought a new box and I had brought a new journal.
This was a new start to our Abercrombie adventures. Maybe the things in the box were missing or destroyed but the memories were still there on that mountain. My first climb was still fresh in my memory, running ahead and grabbing the dried up tree moss and making beards, and waiting for the rest of the group to catch up and exclaiming "I have waited so long that I have grown a beard!", or falling on the way down and twisting my ankle and Ashley screaming at my dad, "Kati broke her leg!!" just to get them to hurry down.
Every time I climb I make a new memory. This time I had the joy to share the climb with new climbers... my friends.
I placed in the time capsule a picture of Hillary and I in India with some of our students.
I figured it was a good way to end one journey and now start on a new one.


Monday, May 24, 2010

I have been taking baby steps.

I have been trying to figure out how my legs work... How life works.

I have taken those baby steps and now I am starting to run and jump, and loving every bit of it.

I am finding out that my legs are strong and can handle whatever comes my way.

I am figuring out life again.

pocket size.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Monday was just another Monday. The beginning of the week. Coming back from a weekend of fun and feeling exhausted.

But my Monday did not really end like every other Monday....

As I walked to my microbiology class, I saw a man out front of my community college passing something out to fellow students walking by.

My first thought.... "O man, I don't want to take a flyer from this guy and then have to find a place to recycle it or have it clutter my backpack with all the other random, pointless papers."

I tried to think really fast of a way I could avoid this man. Nope, no way. I was going to have to face him.

As I walked towards him he held out a pocket size, GREEN, book of some sort. He said something as his hand and the book were outstretched towards me, but I did not hear him.

The pocket size, green book had bold letters on the front that caught my attention, "NEW TESTAMENT".

This brought a smile immediately to my face and I reached out and took the pocket size, green New Testament Bible from his hand. I thanked him and continued on my way.

Then it occurred to me that I did not know why this man was passing these little New Testament Bibles out.
Throughout my class, all I could think about is why this man was there spending his time passing out these small Bibles. I knew I would not get a chance to ask him, because he only had a few left to pass out and my class was going to be longer then usual.

After class, I walked out a different entrance because I knew the man most likely would not be outside anymore. Minding my own business as I usually do, I started to text and then was quickly startled by a voice asking me if I would like a New Testament Bible. I quickly looked up with a big smile. This was a different man doing the same thing.

I explained to him that I had already received one, but that I was curious as to why him and his friend were outside passing these New Testament Bibles out?

He replied by saying, "We think that more kids need to read the Bible these days."
I was a little turned off by this reply.

But then he continued by saying...
"We don't expect these Bibles to change everyone or even affect them right now. We just hope that one day maybe this will help someone. Maybe one day someone will need this, and they will have one."

This answer satisfied me much more.

We talked a little more and then I thanked him and continued on with my Monday.

This stuck with me and actually is still sticking with me. Here were two men out, just hoping to somehow impact someone's life. Not preaching, not judging, not pushing. Just simply sharing a little pocket size, green bit of goodness.

1st day of spring

Monday, April 19, 2010

Today was the first day of spring... at least to me.

You might be thinking to yourself "why was today the first day of spring for her? Come on Kati, the first day of spring was way back in March."

Let me then explain myself.

Spring defined to me is...

The sun shinning.

The need to roll down your car windows.

Homework become 2nd to everything else.

Reuniting with old friends.

Red tulips lining a yard.

Tandem bike rides with a friend.

Your mind is care free and HAPPINESS is all you feel!

'For behold, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone.
'The flowers have already appeared in the land;
The time has arrived for pruning the vines,
And the voice of the turtledove has been heard in our land.
'The fig tree has ripened its figs,
And the vines in blossom have given forth their fragrance.
Arise, my darling, my beautiful one,
And come along!' "
Song 2:11-13

This is how I know it is finally spring.

Doesn't spring sound magical?!

Sunday, April 4, 2010

My eyes fight the urge to close.

My feet drag, creating friction with the floor.

My homework seems almost impossible.

My mouth only seems to spout out negative words that make negative sentences.

My mind races with different thoughts, confusion, emotions, and to-do-lists.

My heart yearns for adventure, purpose, love, change of scenery, airplanes that take me far away, India.

And with all of this stuff, you know what comes to my mind?... A song, that speaks to me.

"So I crawl underneath my blanket
Where I can hide away
I know I can't take it
‘Cause I see now
It's just one of those days."

So I keep hoping, it's just one of those days.


Saturday, March 27, 2010

I love traveling. I feel as if I will never get sick of it.

I am in Kuala Lumpur airport right now getting ready to board a plane that leaves to Korea. I am so thrilled because we get to spend 12 hours looking around Korea.

So far this trip I have been to 3 different countries. On the way over to Borneo, Chris and I had a day in Hong Kong. It was so exciting to explore the city. At the first sight of the city I started to squeel with excitment. I felt like a little kid seeing Disney Land for the first time.

I just LOVE new place and sights.

I wish there was a Major for a world traveler.


Tuesday, March 16, 2010

In the process of growing up, why do we often lose the importance of playing?

This past week I have spent almost 24/7 with three small boys. There has been plenty of punching, screaming, disobeying, lying and being caught in the lie, air soft wounds, skateboarding wounds, and more than an ear full of name calling. O the name calling... I mean how many times do you get to hear "He's such a fat turtle lard." ?

This is what makes a little boy.

You know what I love about these little boys? They aren’t afraid to play and play hard. They play until they are all tuckered out. They play until their pants are caked in dirt, they play until they have won the war.

In the beginning of this week I was so concerned with the things I had to get done. The boys would ask me to play and I always had something I had to do. I could only play for a little bit.

Then one day this week one of the little guys said to me "Kati come play. EVERYONE needs to play."

This is soo true. In India I told myself I was going to make time for the important things and live each day to the max. Capacity. And here I was not doing that one bit. I am convinced that playing is important and that is why most kids are happy...because they PLAY!

kids are so smart.

A boy is Truth with dirt on it's face,
Beauty with a cut on its finger,
Wisdom with bubble gum in its hair,
and the Hope of the future with a frog in its pocket.
-- Author Unknown

God created boys, full of spirit and fun to explore and conquer, to romp and run.

A child reminds us that playtime is an essential part of our daily routine.
-- Anonymous


Thursday, February 25, 2010

You know those days when something happens and it just makes your entire year?

Like your parents telling you that you are going to Disneyland for the first time.

Or you finally conquer something that you have been working on for a long time.

I had one of those moments this week...

My moment came in a small red,blue, and white envelope with tiger stamps all over it.

Large block letters spelled "AIR MAIL".

I opened it up quickly and read, " My dearest daughter Kati." My eyes quickly filled with tears. Where they happy or sad tears? both.

Happy because this letter was from Raju, Amma and Blaine. My family from India. I was so happy to hear that they still thought of me as a daughter, even though I was oceans away.

Sad because I missed them so much and wanted to hear them vocalize these sweet words to me.

The letter tore at my heart. He told me how they had celebrated ammas 27th birthday and how much they missed us there with them. They even sent a picture of amma blowing out her candles. He reminded me constantly of how everyday they miss us and pray for us. Raju told me how much him and amma missed me and how amma still cries because she misses us so much. He thanked me for how much love we gave them, but I feel as if they gave us so much more love.

I miss their simple, pure love.

Their love showed me how God loves us everyday.

I never thought that a handwritten letter would make my year.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Back from India...

but still my mind is filled with thoughts of India...

Amma, Raju, Blaine.
My students.
The nights filled with stars.

The simplicity of just being.

I miss the simplicity.

Now I feel rushed again. Like I am on overdrive.

I think India has more hours in a day than America.

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